Last night I watched the first in the new series of Shipwrecked - I'll watch anything which has palm trees and blue skies and white sand. You can throw in some sexy bodies for good measure too if you like. Of the new contestants Stuart gets my vote anything he likes. Posh bird Lucy gets my vote for person who should be left behind at the end of the series. She can't bear the erosion of British culture and thinks slavery should be brought back. When asked if she hates black people she says she's never met one but all those she's seen have been "like, really baaaad". Come back Jade, all is forgiven.