I see the tabloids have picked up on the latest reality tv shipwrecked/racism thing. The girl is only eighteen and has probably never stepped out of her blinkered, elitist, middle-class bubble so it is not so shocking but you can't help but wonder where she got her views from. I daresay she's learnt it parrot fashion from conversations with mummy and daddy over dinner at their palace in the home counties. I think it's a big mistake for people to insist that those views are not broadcast, that would be just sweeping the issue under the carpet...

Last night I watched the first in the new series of Shipwrecked - I'll watch anything which has palm trees and blue skies and white sand. You can throw in some sexy bodies for good measure too if you like. Of the new contestants Stuart gets my vote anything he likes. Posh bird Lucy gets my vote for person who should be left behind at the end of the series. She can't bear the erosion of British culture and thinks slavery should be brought back. When asked if she hates black people she says she's never met one but all those she's seen have been "like, really baaaad". Come back Jade, all is forgiven.

related to my post about hypnosis, this blogger has created a 20 minute mp3 which stimulates your brain as an alternative to caffeine. Maybe I'll try both! Lots of comments and skeptical discussion here

I need something new to look forward to because this week I passed a huge milestone and had thought about little else in the months leading up to it. On Tuesday I went to the dentist to have a couple of overdue fillings which had been put off for 18 months. It sounds kind of pathetic but I was dreading it all that time and felt like I had a ticking timebomb in my mouth waiting to go off, and would invariably think about the creeping decay when I went to bed and when I woke up in the morning. I've usually been okay with dentists but since I got sick a few years ago and felt weak as a kitten it became a bit of a trauma for me. The last two times I had work done I passed out in the chair, so was half expecting the same to happen this time. Thankfully it passed without incident and I felt strangely composed (must have been the hypnosis!) and a part of me enjoyed the challenge of facing my fears (though I very nearly didn't go at all - I think the charge for not going probably was a factor). The dentist was this really sweet Irishman about ten years my junior. When he'd finished I wanted to kiss him but he said it probably wasn't a good idea considering the mercury fumes emanating from my mouth. Now I'm feeling that much stronger I think the phobia may have passed which is in itself a huge relief. I was on such a high when I got home that the first thing I did was call my mum to tell her the fantastic news. Now I feel I have a new lease of life and am protected from the ravages of decay for another year or so at least, I need something else to think about in my plan for the months ahead... (which is quite nice though, it's not that I'm really demotivated by it).

for a few years I've been into self-hypnosis, which sounds kind of nutty but I'm sure it has some effect (in a purely scientific way) and even if it doesn't it sure is fun. Just the other night before bed I was remarking to myself that most people probably drift off sleep while letting their thoughts meander in whatever aimless direction they like, which seems kind of inconceivable to me now (and a wasted opportunity) having done this hypnosis/visualisation for so long. There's a much watched-video on youtube extolling the virtues of "programming yourself" though even that seems intended to work on a semi-subliminal level too (high quality quicktime version here.)

I invariably listen to MP3s from brainsync.com while drifting off. You can have a loony lady from LA placing positive thoughts in your subconscious while binaural beats massage your brain into submission. There's a free demo mp3 to be had here (you need headphones incidentally). There are several different frequencies of binaural beats which have different effects supposedly. It's not obvious from hearing them but they do make you feel slightly disorientated and trancelike pretty quickly - well they do me anyway. I love weird shit!

look mum - I'm on iTunes